Meet The-Dark-Mistress-Of-Denial
For: Busy people who live in denial of the fact that the vehicle via which we browse the internet is, in fact, a human body….
Who: The-Dark-Mistress-Of-Denial. Who is She? You may already know her … 40+ years old, 20 years of deskwork behind her, in need of stress relief, and 20 years work of deskwork in front (because, of course, It’s all SO IMPORTANT). The Dark-Mistress-Of-Denial has a plan for all the projects at work, a plan for weight-loss, a plan for paying the mortgage, a plan for her investments (nee escape-hatch), and a plan for you if you get too close…. and yet. She is sufficiently lacking in awareness of the fact she is doing this from within a REAL HUMAN BODY to be genuinely surprised when some annoying capacity-reducing health issue (Humph… just like the one her MOTHER had) appears. She is in fact an avatar – a unique splicing of human genes and Excel Spreadsheet.
Challenge:The Dark-Mistress-Of-Denial is, of course, an achiever, but in this blog is learning to cast her consciousness to the fact that she is encased in a soft body-like structure that has its own requirements. Scientific analysis has shown it to be part flab, part water, part muscle, and part some energy thing that can’t be sustained by caffeine and alcohol alone. Hence the weight-loss, wholistic fitness and stress relief goals – it’s time to get a grip.
The Issues: The Dark-Mistress-Of-Denial has an obsession with the mental “list-of-things-to-be-done”, suffers acutely from “not-enough-time” syndrome, and in recent years has been nagged by the re-occurring internal debate on wether a glass of wine (or five) provides better stress relief than a 30 minute meditation. (Usually the glass of wine wins). She needs to achieve her weight-loss goals and get fit. She also has a genetic predisposition to knee and thyroid problems, cyst-producing ovaries and midnight period pain that is extreme enough to provide the opportunity to re-appraise what she had for lunch that day (not a weight-loss strategy). For relaxation she leaves her body and sails around cyberspace, often forgetting to feed and water the crisp of a shell she leaves at the keyboard behind. She also starts the project today with a torn neck muscle and mouse-shoulder.
Why? Because the chances are that if you are reading this blog you’re suffering a bit of screen-fever yourself … (and I’ll bet the idea of setting some kind of weight-loss goal has crossed your mind already this year). Plus – here on The Balance Blog we’re proud to provide a unique airing of the fact that the Internet is … well… sometimes a bit crap, and that a life spent engaging with it might just be an exercise in mass projection.
Goals: This is about adopting a different view and just getting out there and remembering real life. Here is the public statement of weight-loss, fitness and stress relief goals for self-flagellation purposes… but really there’s a bigger picture. Click Here for
Weight-Loss Goals
Approach: The approach to all this is holistic because it has to be – this weight-loss caper is for life. We’re doing holistic fitness because avoiding injury is a good idea – so lots of yoga and pilates amidst the pavement-pounding. A bit of meditation for stress relief, and the natural weight-loss regime borrows heavily from the holistic measures of the publishers WellBeing.com.au.
The Rules: No bull, even if it’s a weight-loss disaster and she gains 20 Kgs.
The Mistress mentions brands only if she thinks you’ll find them useful – thanks to allergies it’s mostly natural and organic products. The Mistress pays for all the products and services used, or will notify you if using a sample donated by a sponsor.
