Forgiveness is a great start to the New Year

Forgiveness is not just about forgiving others. It is also about forgiving yourself. For some people just learning how to forgive is a journey that can take their whole life and for others it is learnt quickly. Forgiving yourself is sometimes a bit harder than forgiving others.

All of us have from time to time done things that we are ashamed of as no one is perfect. We all have regrets but there are things you can do that can help you to heal those and move past your mistakes. This can transform you as a person. Of course, part of our humanity is to make errors in our lives and this is one reason why self-forgiveness is important. It can give you strength to lead better, stress free lives.

How to forgive myself?

Sometimes people in sessions with me tell me they are undeserving and they hate themselves. My reply is usually the question of what did they do that was so bad? That’s when I find out just how much the self-hatred has built inside them sometimes for the smallest of reasons. In order to forgive yourself you need to accept and understand that you cannot change your past, no matter what. It is pointless to dwell obsessively over your past on what you could have, should have, would have done. It is a waste of your time and energy as nothing can ever change about your past. So why beat yourself up? This only leads to self-hatred. It is more important to learn from your mistakes and move forward.

Take a look at the person you were then and the person you are now. What was your mental, emotional, and spiritual maturity back then? You are not that same person now. You are older and more experienced. The person who even performed that action is no longer there. The you that made that mistake does not exist anymore.

Your mistake is a reflection of your dark side

Everyone has a dark side to their nature. This is called our shadow self. It is often a place within us that we would prefer not to look. Your dark side is usually unconscious and comes from experiences in your life that taught you that certain parts of you were good and other parts were bad. This shadow part of yourself is the part where the self-sabotage, jealousy, rage, and other bad actions that could hurt our loved one’s lives. It is important to remember is that this is just one part of you, it is not the whole of you. Whatever you did is not a reflection of your true nature, it comes from your unexamined shadow making you feel bad.

Forgiveness is about expressing your grief and regrets

When you feel shame, guilt and regret it’s important to take the time to process these feelings. Worry and obsessive thinking over old memories stop us from processing our feelings. It is self-torture. Healing involves facing ourselves, feeling the feelings and expressing them. One technique to deal with this is to begin journaling your thoughts, feelings and reflections. So, they don’t sit inside you and eat away at you. This helps you transmute your pain into self-forgiveness. Use your creativity to paint, sing, dance or find other ways to express your feelings also.

Use your energy to transform

Archetypes are patterns of energy that can be found within us, within societies, different races, and periods of time. Common archetypes include a warrior figure or personality, a gentler maiden, a hero type, a nurturer or mother, someone who is always a victim or a wise person. Learning about these archetypes enables you to use the energy of them to transmute and evolve, to mature and discover more about yourself as a human being. It opens the doors to inner guidance and assists in learning to forgive yourself. You can find more on relationships and healing on this link https://www.wellbeing.com.au/kinship/relationships/relationships-and-healing.html

How does forgiveness give me insight into my unmet needs?

If you regret your actions and look inside you will find that a part of forgiving yourself is to allow yourself to discover what needs you were trying to meet by your past actions. Often our foolish actions are selfish ones driven by desires or a need for self-preservation because we feel threatened. This gets us into trouble as we try to fulfil them. Did you have a need to be loved more deeply at the time, to be respected more, to feel safe, to be seen? If you understand what needs you had at the time you completed the regretful action you will begin to see more clearly the person you were then and why you acted that way. That is a great step towards forgiving yourself.

Letting go as a forgiveness ritual

At some point you will realise that it is just time for you to let go and start fresh. A release ritual can help you to let go and move on. Simply write what you’d like to let go of on your piece of paper. Spell out clearly what you need to say goodbye to and find a quiet place to read it out aloud – to the universe. Then, light the paper, drop it into your fire pit bowl, and watch it burn. While it burns, know that you are also burning away those old patterns and habits and let the universe do with it what it will. This is a great way to start your new year. Just to let go and move on.

The aim of energy work is to help you integrate all the levels of your being and move forward. Whether it be with release rituals, journaling techniques, assisting you with expanding your creativity, teaching you how to worry less, meditate and be more mindful, create healthy boundaries or forgive yourself and others you have the ability to use what is right for you. We, at https://www.stressfreehealthmanagement.com/ as practitioners and others, can teach you that.