We want to have a baby so why isn’t it happening?

Couples often get disheartened when after the huge decision to have a baby they find that pregnancy is just not happening. They may have found the house, have stable jobs, are part of the way paying off the mortgage and if any time was right to fall pregnant it would be now…but despite the best of efforts it just does not occur.

There are a number of factors to take into account when this happens and the first is stress. Living a stressful lifestyle with hello and goodbye kisses in the hall on the way to work, a quick breakfast, racing to work, running to the gym and rush, rush, rush does not make for an environment to fall pregnant. So first on the list for both partners is a big slow down.

Similarly being stressed about it not happening will only add to the problems. Many a couple have only made it harder to fall pregnant by charting ovulation and running home for a ‘quickie’. The stress of it not happening in time simply makes it not happen at all. It is important to relax, do some meditation, have an adequate diet, take the correct supplements (and yes higher doses of supplements are important for both partners) and to prepare to have a third person in your life.

If you have been trying for a year though and been having intercourse at the right times of the month then it is possible there could be some unknown medical reasons why you are not pregnant. Also if the woman has not been able to have a baby to full term there will be medical reasons also. Then it may be time to consult your family doctor or a natural therapist to assist you with fertility.

There are different types of infertility. Some couples have never conceived, others have a child but have problems having another one. There could be many causes. If the problem is male based then there could be problems with the sperm count, an obstruction in a duct, the sperm are not mobile enough or they simply don’t hit the ‘target’.

Females may have a problem with the vagina, the tubes, the cervix, the womb, the positioning of the organs or a tightening of the vagina causing painful intercourse and hence the sperm not entering. There are many medical terms for all the issues that can occur with the vagina such as vaginal atresia, narrow introitus, vaginismus, cervical obstruction, prolapsed, cervical mucus and anti-sperm antibodies.

There are also uterine problems such as malformations, fibroids or tubal blockages, adhesions and defects or polycystic ovaries, ovarian tumours, thyroid problems and many different types of hormone problems.

What a huge list. Is it any wonder couples get stressed? What couples are often not told is that roughly one in seven couples have problems conceiving.

Remedies for this of course are via the medical profession and natural therapies. It is a good idea to see a specialist who can examine the genitals, analyse the semen, hormones and do chromosome and immunity tests. Add to this the usual blood tests and ultrasounds….and all the time the stress levels of both male and female are increasing.

Other tests are regarding endocrine dysfunction, sonograms, follicular studies, checking of the fallopian tubes, endometrial biopsies, vaginal swabs to check for infection and laparoscopy. Sometimes only small procedures are needed to correct an internal problem.

From the natural standpoint a practitioner will look at the immunity and constitution of the couple and usually use natural supplements to assist in fertility. This is important for both partners as both need to prepare to ‘seed’ a healthy child. Amounts of alcohol consumption, smoking, taking of prescription and non prescription drugs are important as is the type of contraceptive pill the female was taking in previous years.

There is no single remedy for this complicated issue. However it is not always as complicated as people believe. The human body needs to be treated gently and as a whole. If you look at all levels of care when attempting to fall pregnant…energetically, spiritually, emotionally, intellectually and physically then it becomes like a puzzle and you simply have to fit the final piece… your baby. Programs for fertility need to be tailored to suit YOU as an individual. This child will be your child and no other two people can be this baby’s parents. So you need to look at what you do in your life and what negative patterns you have that could be holding you locked into an inability to conceive. A good natural therapist will be able to assist you with this. Your baby will need an environment of gentleness and love so be gentle with yourselves and each other. Eat well, support each other, stress less and create an environment where your spirit can grow. For those so inclined meditate and pray. Prayer is good for the soul so they say. However always remember, God helps those that help themselves …so add action to your prayers.