Your inner flirt

It’s a tough old world out there if you are afloat in the shark infested waters of the dating sea. Your chances of finding true love depend entirely on your ability to get past the initial perilous and uncertain moments. This is where the time-honoured art of flirting comes into play. While some find this easier than others, we all have our own flirting style and new research has shed some light into this shadowy area.

For this research more than 5000 people were interviewed to establish how they go about communicating interest. As a result of the research five styles of flirting were identified. See if you can place where you might lie in this field.

Physical flirting involves expressing predominantly sexual interest in someone. Physical flirters usually develop relationships quickly and base those relationships on sexual chemistry although they have a strong emotional link with their partner.

Traditional flirting is advocated by people who think that men should make the first move. Women who are traditional flirts tend to feel they have trouble getting a man’s attention while male traditionalists are likely to know someone a long time before approaching them. For both sexes of the traditionalist bent, a more intimate dating scene is preferred.

Polite flirting is a style that revolves around manners and does not base itself on sex. In fact those of the polite persuasion do not find flirting flattering and seek more meaningful relationships.

Sincere flirting, as the name suggests, involves creating genuine emotional connections. While a meaningful relationship is the aim, there is usually a strong sexual chemistry between sincere flirters.

Playful flirting is employed by people who have little interest in long-term romance. For the playful flirter while flirting is enjoyable it is also used to enhance self-esteem. Playful flirters are less likely to have significant and meaningful relationships in the long run.

Of course, while this study did not consider it, there is all sorts of advice out there as to how you should flirt. Bringing that advice together for the gentlemen it seems that a subtle combination of puffing out your chest, standing tall, making eye contact at regular but not too substantial intervals, raising one arm above shoulder height, and periodically arching your eyebrows will indicate your romantic intent provided you can pull it off without appearing to be either constipated or a member of a Russian dance troupe. Ladies you need to blend holding your knees toward your body, arching your back, tossing your hair, gently biting your knuckle, and subtle touches of his arm without looking as though you have a degenerative nerve disease.

There is no single way to successfully flirt. What this research highlights is that beyond the generic tips, a little self-awareness of your own preferences and style will make the game that much easier to play.

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