The drawcards of solo travel are strong. Visiting places on your own terms, at your own pace and relying solely on your own decision-making can be an empowering life lesson. But as liberating as travelling on your own can be, it can also be a lonely and sometimes isolating experience.
As a travel writer, I have done my fair share of solo travel and have experienced both the liberating and lonely moments. What I’ve learnt is that solo travel does not, and should not, mean you’re on your own all the time. In fact, solo travel is at its best when it offers you the opportunity to forge meaningful friendships and connect with people you might not otherwise have come across in your everyday life.
I make a conscious effort to connect with people in the place I’m visiting, whether they are locals or tourists. It doesn’t always come easily to me, and I often struggle to make the first move. Sometimes, saying “hello” isn’t as easy as it sounds, so here are my tried-and-tested tactics for befriending people abroad.
Sofia Levin is a journalist and founder of Seasoned Traveller, a website that celebrates the intersection of travel and food. “The funny thing about solo travel is that you’re very rarely solo,” says Sofia. “It’s an opportunity to meet new people and become truly immersed in another culture because you’re leaving what you know behind. You don’t have the familiar to fall back on. Being outside my comfort zone in that way is when I feel most myself; it’s a total rush.”
It’s not all roses though, especially when it comes to a major part of travelling — eating. “The main disadvantage of solo travel is that I can feel limited when dining alone,” says Sofia. “It’s nearly impossible for me to order a single dish when I’m excited and the more stomachs joining me at the table, the more I can try. There’s a fine line between being selfish and sharing, eh?”
I found dining alone particularly difficult when travelling solo in China, for the same reason as Sofia, and another reason too: I spent a year working in Nanjing, a city that doesn’t attract as many international travellers as, say, Beijing or Shanghai.
I already garnered plenty of looks as a foreigner and I noticed this more when I ate alone. I felt extremely self-conscious in the early days, but gained my confidence by initiating conversations with waiters and restaurant owners, and quickly learned that if I sat at the bar, there would often be other solo diners to chat with.
If attempting spontaneous conversations fills you with dread, organised settings can be an easier way to meet people as you’re likely to come across those also looking to socialise.
Join a walking tour
This is one of my favourite things to do when arriving in a new city or town. Walking tours are a convenient way of geographically acquainting yourself with a new place. They’re educational and many of them work on a “pay what you feel” model. Being in an organised setting, it’s easier to introduce yourself to a fellow traveller and discuss things you see along the way. I’ve been on several walking tours where guides ask people to introduce themselves, which breaks the ice in an easy way and invites further conversation.
Sign up for a multi-day tour
If your itinerary allows, you might want to factor in a few longer tours. This could be a visit to a historically significant site, a hiking tour or a day cruise. Tours can be a fun way to travel and learn while meeting other people. Chances are there will be quite a few things to talk and laugh about.
Go to a cooking class
This is something I aim to do on every trip. I am a firm believer that food is one of the best ways to experience a new culture. Cooking classes are often run by a local and give you the chance to learn about dishes and their history first-hand. It’s an enriching way to experience the country you’re visiting, and you can take your new-found skills back home and recreate the dishes whenever you want to relive your trip. Plus, if you book through the school or teacher, it directly contributes to the local economy.
When the class has finished cooking, everyone comes together to eat, usually at the same table. Breaking bread and enjoying a stew, curry, pasta — you name it — is a fantastic way to make connections.
Stay in a hostel
This is one of the easiest ways to meet people and you don’t necessarily need to stay in a hostel dorm to do so. The social energy of hostels invites effortless conversation, whether it be at the breakfast buffet or over a game of pool. Many hostels also run organised events, so you’ll have even more opportunities to spend time with people. The key is to not retreat to your room. Hang out in the common areas and don’t be glued to your phone. You may meet someone great.
Reach out to friends of friends
This one takes a bit of planning. Before departing for your trip, ask your close friends and family if they know anyone where you’re headed. The power of referral is strong and meeting someone you have a mutual connection with can definitely take the edge off. If you do this, be sure to share a photo of you and your new friend with your mutual connection.
When it comes to travelling solo and meeting people, my number-one tip is to channel a little courage. You’d be surprised how many other people are wanting to form new connections. “Lead with a smile and say ‘hello’, regardless of the language,” says Sofia. “Then go with curiosity. The rest will come — and hopefully so will a meal invite!”
Caterina Hrysomallis is an Australian-based journalist, editor and content producer. She specialises in the areas of culture, health, travel and design.
